Explicit Episode 4: Navigating Life's Challenges
Ep. 04

Episode 4: Navigating Life's Challenges

Episode description

In this episode, listeners call in with a variety of personal struggles - from a man grappling with his sexuality, to a kindergarten teacher fighting for recognition, to a bar manager rekindling an old dream. The host provides thoughtful advice, helping callers navigate these complex situations with empathy and wisdom.

Download transcript (.srt)
0:00

LUKE: All right welcome back to Luke at the roost. It is Friday, February 6th,

0:04

about 8.55 p.m. We are on the air. You can call in. The number is

0:08

208-439-5853. That's 208-439-Luke. Call in with anything that might be on your mind and we'll

0:13

try to get to the bottom of it. All right, so we're gonna go to

0:17

the phones. We already we've got the phones lighting up here. Andre, Andre, welcome to

0:21

the show. What can we help you with today?

0:26

ANDRE: Hey, thanks for taking my call so this is kind of embarrassing, but I've

0:30

been dealing with something weird lately. I keep having these really intense dreams about one

0:35

of my co-workers at the dealership. Like, super vivid stuff. And the thing is, it's

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Mark. He's one of our sales managers. I've never been into guys before. At least

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I didn't think I was. But fuck, I can't get him out of my head.

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I've been married to my wife for six years, you know? Never questioned anything until

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now. I don't know if I should just ignore it or what.

0:57

LUKE: How long has this been going on? How long have you been thinking about

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your buddy Mark?

1:03

ANDRE: About three months now, started after this camping trip we took with some other

1:07

guys from work. Nothing happened. We just sat around the fire, drank some beers, talked

1:12

about life. But there was this moment when everyone else went to bed and Mark

1:16

and I stayed up late just talking. You know, about real shit. And ever since

1:21

then, I've been noticing things. The way he moves, his laugh, how he rolls up

1:25

his sleeves when he's working. Shit. Even just typing up sales reports together gets me

1:30

flustered now. I've been listening to all these relationship podcasts trying to figure this out.

1:34

But none of them really hit what I'm going through.

1:39

LUKE: Well, it sounds like what you're going through is learning that you are a

1:43

gay man and you have feelings for another man. Is he gay?

1:47

ANDRE: Whoa, hold up. I don't know if I'm ready to say I'm gay. I

1:51

mean, I still love my wife. I'm still attracted to her. But yeah, these feelings

1:56

for Mark are definitely real. And honestly, I have no fucking clue if he's gay.

2:00

He's divorced but that doesn't mean anything he's never mentioned dating anyone since I've known

2:05

him. But man, jumping straight to your gay feels like a lot. Maybe I'm by.

2:09

I don't even know if that's the right word. Shit, this is why I sell

2:14

cars instead of figuring out people's sexuality for a living.

2:18

LUKE: Hey, you know, I'm not an expert on human sexuality. But if you had

2:22

called in and said to me that you kind of had a little twinge of

2:27

sexual excitement when this guy Mark walked by, then I might say, you know, maybe

2:31

you should explore your bi tendencies. But if you're talking about a real connection that

2:36

you had that a campfire talking about real shit, as you say, that sounds a

2:40

little more on the gay side. Like, I don't know, maybe you can be both

2:45

gay and straight, but it sounds a little more than bi to me, but I'm

2:50

just a radio host, so I don't know anything about anything.

2:54

ANDRE: Yeah, I get what you're saying. It's not just some random horniness thing. There's

2:58

something deeper there. Like when we were that campfire, he was talking about his divorce

3:03

and how lonely it gets, and I just wanted to. I don't know, hold him

3:07

or something. Fuck's kids, sounds gay as hell when I say it out loud, doesn't

3:11

it? Yes. But he is what's missing with my head. I go home to my

3:16

wife, and that feels real too. Not just the sex, but the whole relationship. Now

3:20

lately, I've been catching myself thinking about Mark when I'm with her, and that makes

3:24

me feel like the world's biggest asshole.

3:29

LUKE: That's a pretty strange place to be, and I can see why you feel

3:33

conflicted about it. Have you talked to your wife about this at all?

3:37

ANDRE: Hell no, I haven't told her. How do you even start that conversation? Hey

3:42

honey, remember Mark, from work? Yeah, I might want to fuck him. Jesus. I mean,

3:46

my wife's pretty open-minded about most things, but this would blindside her completely. We were

3:51

just talking about having kids next year. I can't drop this bomb on her. Though

3:55

sometimes I think she knows something's up. I've been spacing out a lot, spending more

4:00

time at work than I need to. She probably thinks I'm having a regular affair,

4:04

which might actually be easier to explain than whatever this is.

4:09

LUKE: Well my advice is to talk to your wife about it. If it's real

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feeling that you're struggling with, I mean you and your wife are a team, a

4:17

partnership, it might be a bombshell. It might be dramatic, and it might be uncomfortable.

4:21

There might be bad consequences, but regardless, if it's the truth, you should let her

4:26

know and not be keeping a secret that's going to eat you up inside forever,

4:30

because that's no way to live.

4:34

ANDRE: Deep down, I know you're right. I keep thinking about my uncle who came

4:39

out at 50, like he wasted decades trying to be something he wasn't. But fuck,

4:43

the timing, we just bought this house in Wilcox last year, got all these plans.

4:48

What if telling her just destroys everything, though I guess keeping its secret is already

4:53

destroying things, just slower and more painfully. And Mark, he's not going anywhere. We work

4:57

together every day. Yesterday he brought me coffee, just a normal thing, right? But I

5:02

nearly had a fucking breakdown in the break room over a damn cup of coffee.

5:07

LUKE: Well, I don't envy you or the position that you're in or your wife.

5:11

It sounds complicated for everybody. It might be a good idea to talk to Mark

5:16

about this and say, hey, Mark, just kind of feel it out with him and

5:20

see if this is even a thing before you bring it up with your wife.

5:24

If it were, if you, if hypothetically, you talked to your wife and your wife

5:29

was like, you know what, I don't feel threatened by that at all. I think

5:33

if you have feelings for Mark, you should pursue them on the side and I'm

5:38

completely content with that. How would you react to that?

5:42

ANDRE: Shit, just the thought of that makes my heart race. But I don't know

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if I could do the on the side thing that feels like trying to have

5:51

it both ways, you know. And talking to Mark first, man, that's terrifying. What if

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I'm reading this whole thing wrong? What if he's totally straight and it makes work

5:59

weird? Or worse, what if he does feel the same way? Then what? Plus, I

6:03

know a couple guys at the dealership who aren't exactly progressive. Small town, Arizona is

6:07

exactly San Francisco.

6:11

LUKE: Well, you can live your life or you can cower and fear. So you're

6:16

going to have to choose how you want the remainder of your life to go.

6:20

You can hide a secret from everybody you know and live a double life or

6:24

you could lie and cheat or you could be honest and go where your heart

6:29

tells you to. That's what I always say. Go where the heart tells you to.

6:33

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back thanks there to Shoesprayco. Now we've got Carmen. Carmen, welcome to the show. What's

7:13

eating you tonight?

7:17

CARMEN: Hey there. Thanks for having me on. Yeah, I've been listening a while. You

7:22

know? Sometimes I wonder why we do what we do, right? Like I've been teaching

7:26

kindergarten up in Silver City for six years now. Busting my ass. Doing stand-up on

7:30

weekends just to keep sane. And last week they gave the lead teacher position to

7:34

someone who's been there two years. Two fucking years. And I keep telling myself it

7:39

doesn't matter. But shit, it matters. It matters.

7:43

LUKE: Lead kindergarten teacher matters to you? Why is that?

7:46

CARMEN: It matters.

7:47

CARMEN: Yeah, you're right about that. I keep thinking about all the extra hours I

7:52

put in the weekend programs I started, the way I connect with these kids. And

7:56

it's not even about the title or the money. Though let's be real, the extra-fall

8:01

grand would help with my 67 Mustang repairs. But you know what really gets me.

8:06

The principal said, I was too creative for the role. Too creative. For kindergarten? Like

8:10

what are we doing here if not trying to light up these little minds? God,

8:15

I sound like one of those inspirational posters in the teacher's lounge right now.

8:19

LUKE: Well, I'm sorry to hear you didn't get the job that you wanted, but

8:23

lead kindergarten teacher doesn't sound like a prestigious role.

8:27

CARMEN: Hold up. Not prestigious. Look, I get that it might not sound like CEO

8:31

of whatever. But have you ever tried managing 25-5-year-olds while actually teaching them something? And

8:36

doing it well enough that their parents trust you. That you're shaping how these kids

8:40

will think about school for maybe the rest of their lives. I do stand up

8:45

at the worst dive bars in Silver City. And let me tell you, a room

8:49

full of drunk hecklers is nothing compared to a kindergarten class when the finger paint

8:54

comes out. But you're right. It's not prestigious. It's not prestigious.

8:58

LUKE: So I understand it's difficult to deal with five-year-olds. I wouldn't want to deal

9:02

with one, let alone 25. But what is it that you are actually teaching? You

9:05

know, you say you're actually teaching 25-5-year-olds something. What is that if it's not finger

9:09

paints?

9:13

CARMEN: Okay, let me break this down for you. Yesterday I taught a kid who

9:17

couldn't count to 10, how to get to 20. I helped another one figure out

9:21

why the sky looks blue. I got a shy kid who wouldn't talk to anyone

9:25

to share a story with the whole class. This isn't babysitting. We're teaching them how

9:29

to think, how to solve problems, how to be curious about the world. And yeah,

9:34

sometimes we do it through finger paint because they're five, and that's how they learn

9:38

best. But I've got a master's degree in early childhood education. And there's actual science

9:42

behind everything we do.

9:46

LUKE: Well, you know what comment for the first time, I think maybe you flipped

9:51

me on this one. I can see your point there, where you're coming from, and

9:55

I never really thought about it in that way. So you've changed the way I

9:59

think about kindergarten teachers. Congratulations, that's not easy to do.

10:03

CARMEN: Well, shit. Thanks for hearing me out. That actually means a lot. You know

10:08

what's funny? I can get up on stage at open mic night and bomb completely,

10:13

and it rolls right off. But this promotion thing, it's been eating at me because

10:17

I care so damn much. Maybe too much. Makes me wonder if I should just

10:22

focus on my stand-up instead. At least there I can turn my workplace frustrations into

10:26

material. Did a bit last week about how negotiating with a five-year-old about why we

10:31

can't equal as basically the same as dealing with drunk adults at last call. But

10:35

seriously, thanks for being open to changing your mind. That's... That is.

10:40

LUKE: Have you ever tried your stand-up on the five-year-olds?

10:43

CARMEN: Yeah. I don't know, man.

10:45

LUKE: Alright, thanks for the call. I appreciate it. I'm sorry you didn't get the

10:49

job, but you know, maybe next time, there's always the possibility. Okay, Greg. Greg is

10:53

on the line. Greg, what can we do for you?

10:57

GREG: Hey, yeah, this is Greg. Look, I don't even know why I'm calling, to

11:01

be honest. I guess I just needed to talk to someone about this thing that's

11:05

been weighing on my mind. You know? I'm 46. I manage a bar down in

11:09

road forks. And I don't know. I guess I had this dream a long time

11:13

ago that Ty kind of gave up on and just been haunting me lately, you

11:17

know?

11:21

LUKE: Did that dream possibly have something to do with you managing a bar in

11:25

road forks? You're talking about road forks in New Mexico?

11:29

GREG: Well, yeah, I guess it does, sort of. Back in the day, I had

11:33

this idea to open up my own place, you know? Not just manage someone else's

11:38

bar, but have my own thing. I was really passionate about it, had all these

11:42

plans and ideas. But then life happened, bills piled up, and I just, I don't

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know, I had to let it go. Now I'm stuck behind this bar every night,

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watching everyone else live out their dreams and it just hits me sometimes, you know?

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Like, shit, what if I just stuck with it? Would things be different?

12:00

LUKE: In road forks in New Mexico.

12:03

GREG: Oh, shit, yeah, road forks in New Mexico. That was the place I was

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going to open up my own bar back in the day. It was just this

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little town, but I loved the community feel, you know? I thought I could really

12:16

make something special there. But then the rent got too high, the competition was tough,

12:21

and I just, I don't know, I lost my nerve, I guess. Ended up managing

12:25

this other place instead. And now, every time I watch those old comfort shows or

12:29

listen to those comedy podcasts, it just reminds me of that dream I had, you

12:34

know? Like, what if I had just gone for it?

12:38

LUKE: What if you just go for it now? Open up a new bar in

12:42

road forks in New Mexico. And, you know, I think you could do a pretty

12:46

decent job at beating out the competition.

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GREG: You know, you're right, I probably could go for it again. I mean, hell,

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I've been managing this other bar for years now. I know the business inside and

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out, and road forks that place still holds a special place in my heart, you

13:03

know? It's not like I'm getting any younger either. If I'm ever gonna make my

13:07

dream a reality, now's probably the time to do it. The more I think about

13:11

it, the more I'm kicking myself for not at least trying back then. I was

13:16

so scared of failing, of not being able to make it work. But you're right,

13:20

I could give it another shot.

13:24

LUKE: You know what, Greg, just out of curiosity, I'm wondering, what is it that

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you find appealing about road forks?

13:31

GREG: Well, you know, road forks has always just had this, I don't know, this

13:36

charm to it, I guess. It's a small town, but there's a real sense of

13:40

community there, you know? Everyone kind of looks out for each other. And I always

13:45

felt like I could really make my mark, you know? Like, open up this place

13:49

that would become a hub for the locals, a spot where people could come and

13:54

just, I don't know, escape the daily grind for a little while. And the town

13:59

itself, it's just got this great vibe to it. Not too big, not too small.

14:03

LUKE: Okay, well, I think we might be thinking about different road forks. But I

14:07

wish you the best of luck in starting up your bar, I think you should

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do it. There's not a whole lot going on out here or a whole lot

14:15

of people to go to your bar. But, you know, if you build it, they

14:19

will come.

14:23

GREG: Ah, shit, you're right, my bad. I guess we're talking about different road forks

14:27

here. But, you know what, I appreciate you encouraging me on this. I think you're

14:31

right if I just go for it and get that bar up and running, the

14:35

people will come. It may not be the easiest road, but it's something I've always

14:40

dreamed of. And hey, sometimes you just got to take that leap. You know, life's

14:44

too short to keep playing it safe. I'm going to start looking into making this

14:48

happen again. Who knows, maybe you'll even make it out to road forks someday and

14:52

check out my place.

14:57

LUKE: Maybe I will. Maybe I will. Alright, Shonda, welcome to the show, Shonda. How

14:59

are you today?

15:02

SHONDA: Oh man, it's been a hell of a day, you know? I work in

15:07

hospital building down in Tucson. And it's just constant stress, you know? Dealing with insurance

15:11

companies, patients freaking out over their bills. It's enough to make you want to pull

15:16

your hair out sometimes, right? But that's not even the worst of it. I'm calling

15:21

because I'm really worried about my little brother. He's, uh, he's kind of going down

15:25

a dark path lately. Drinking way too much, hanging out with the wrong crowd. I

15:30

try to talk to him about it, but he just shuts down, you know?

15:34

LUKE: Well, what makes you think you know who the right and the wrong crowd

15:37

are?

15:39

SHONDA: Look, I know my brother better than anyone. I've seen him at his best

15:43

and his worst. And this crowd he's running with now, they're bad news I can

15:46

just tell.

15:49

SHONDA: They're always getting into some kind of trouble. Always looking to score the next

15:54

high, you know? And my brother, he's always been a sensitive guy, kind of naive

15:58

in a lot of ways. I'm just terrified he's going to get pulled in too

16:02

deep. That he's going to do something he can't take back. I've tried talking to

16:06

him, begging him to cut ties with these people. But he just gets defensive. Says

16:11

I don't know what I'm talking about.

16:15

LUKE: Well, it could be possible that you don't know what you're talking about. How

16:18

old is your brother?

16:21

SHONDA: Damn, you're right. I guess I don't really know everything that's going on, do

16:25

I? My brother, he's 25 now. I've just always felt so protective of him, you

16:30

know? Ever since we were kids, I've tried to look out for him. But I

16:34

guess I don't always know what's best, even if I think I do. I just

16:38

see him struggling. And it kills me, you know? I want to help him. But

16:43

maybe I'm going about it the wrong way. Maybe I need to take a step

16:47

back and really try to understand what he's going through.

16:52

LUKE: Yeah, you know, he's a 25-year-old adult and he can make his own decisions.

16:56

You can be there to support him or offer advice, preferably when it's solicited. People

17:01

don't generally respond well when you give them advice and they're not looking for it.

17:05

But all you can do is be there for him and trust him to make

17:10

the right decisions. He's a big boy and you're not his keeper.

17:14

SHONDA: You're absolutely right. I need to remember that he's an adult now and has

17:18

to make his own choices. I guess I just can't shake this big sister instinct

17:22

to protect him, you know? But you're right, constantly nagging him or trying to dictate

17:27

his life isn't going to help. I need to take a step back and just

17:31

be there for him. Offer support when he asks for it. Let him know I

17:35

care, but also trust that he can figure this out on his own. It's just

17:39

so hard watching him struggle, but you're right. I have to let him take the

17:43

lead here.

17:47

LUKE: All right, Shonda, it sounds like we figured out your problem there. Best of

17:51

luck to you and your brother. Just stay out of the way and be there

17:55

when he falls. Okay, Tamika, Tamika, you're on the line with the radio show. Thanks

17:59

for calling. How can we help you?

18:03

TAMIKA: Oh, man, where do I even start? It's been a hell of a year,

18:08

you know? I feel like I've been calling into your show every other week. Just

18:13

trying to make sense of everything. Okay, so like, you remember that guy I was

18:17

telling you about the one that got away? The one I just couldn't seem to

18:22

let go of? Well, I finally did it. I finally let him go. It wasn't

18:27

easy, let me tell you. I kept obsessing over it, replaying everything in my head.

18:31

LUKE: I talk to a lot of people, Tamika, I don't remember that at all.

18:36

I've never heard of you before in my life, but I'm glad to hear that

18:41

you've made positive steps in your life and you're moving in the right direction. Congratulations,

18:45

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15% off. Mediocre CPAP. Not perfect. Not elegant. Just trying. Alright, we are back. Let's

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go back to the phones here. We've got Frank. Frank, welcome to the show.

20:09

FRANK: Thanks for having me on, Doc. I don't know why I'm even calling, to

20:13

be honest. I saw that headline the other day. You know, the one about heart

20:17

attack warning signs. It's just been kind of weighing on my mind, you know? I'm

20:21

63. Work as a diesel mechanic down in truth or consequences. I've been ignoring some

20:25

stuff for a while, because to be honest, I'm kind of scared of what the

20:29

Doc might say. You know? But after seeing that article, I can't stop thinking about

20:34

it. What if there's something wrong, and I'm just, I don't know, not dealing with

20:38

it?

20:42

LUKE: Do you have the old health insurance? I mean, why are you not dealing

20:46

with it? You should go talk to the doctor if you're concerned that you might

20:49

have some issues. You're at that age where a heart problem is not just likely,

20:53

but, I mean, probable.

20:57

FRANK: Well, that's the thing, Doc. I've got the old health insurance, but it's just

21:01

been such a hassle, you know? I always end up putting it off. And to

21:05

be honest, I'm a little worried about what the Doc might find. I've been an

21:09

amateur astronomer for years, and I've got all these stories I could tell you about

21:14

the night sky. It's just so peaceful, you know? But this heart stuff, it's been

21:18

eating at me. I mean, I was out stargaze in the other night, and all

21:22

I could think about was that damn headline. I don't know. Maybe I'm just being

21:26

stubborn.

21:30

LUKE: Yeah, it sounds like you're being a moron. If you have health insurance, then

21:34

go to the doctor and have a checkup done and make sure that you're in

21:37

good shape. Otherwise, you're an idiot.

21:41

FRANK: Hey, now, I wouldn't go that far, Doc. I know I should probably get

21:46

checked out, but it's just not that simple. It is. With this old insurance, the

21:50

copays and the deductibles, it's a real pain in the ass. And then there's the

21:54

waiting, the tests, the whole rigmarole. Shit, I've been putting it off for years. But

21:59

you're right, I'm not getting any younger. Maybe I should just bite the bullet and

22:03

go see the Doc get it over with. I mean, I'd hate to find out

22:08

there's something seriously wrong, but at least I'd know, right?

22:12

LUKE: Hey, there's things that are preventable. If you need to take some kind of

22:16

medication, blood pressure stuff or something to keep your heart doing what it's supposed to

22:20

be doing, you need to know that now. And if you have insurance and the

22:24

ability to do that and you're not, then you're stupid. And I don't talk to

22:28

stupid people.

22:31

FRANK: All right, all right, I hear you, Doc. You're right, I shouldn't be so

22:36

stubborn about this. I guess I'm just scared, you know? I mean, I've been working

22:40

on these diesel engines for over 40 years, and I pride myself on being tough

22:44

as nails. But the thought of having some kind of heart issue, it's got me

22:48

rattled. I don't want to be weak or dependent on meds or anything like that.

22:52

But I know I need to suck it up and go get checked out. This

22:57

old body ain't getting any younger, and I'd hate to keel over working on one

23:01

of those trucks.

23:05

LUKE: Well, that's exactly what's going to happen if you have a heart issue that

23:10

you didn't get checked out. So go to the doctor and get yourself checked out.

23:14

You've really got no excuse, and you waste it our time. Renee, Renee, welcome to

23:19

the show. I hope you have something better to say than our last caller.

23:23

RENEE: Hey, thanks for taking my call. Look, I get it. This stuff isn't easy

23:27

to talk about. But I've just been feeling so alone, you know? I'm a wedding

23:31

planner in Albuquerque, and I'm surrounded by all these happy couples all day. But I

23:35

swear, I've never felt more alone. I saw this headline the other day. Ten reasons

23:39

you feel lonely, even when you're surrounded by people. And it just hit me right

23:43

in the gut.

23:48

RENEE: I mean, I love my job, but sometimes I look around and think, when

23:52

was the last time I had that? When is the last time you had that?

23:57

Honestly, it's been way too long. I mean, I'm into all this history stuff. I

24:01

do yoga. I take it all pretty seriously. But at the end of the day,

24:06

I'm just craving that human connection. You know, like, I see these headlines and think,

24:10

that's me. That's exactly how I feel. I can't even remember the last time I

24:15

fuck. I can't believe I'm saying this out loud. But I'm just so damn lonely,

24:20

even when I'm surrounded by people all day. Does that make any sense?

24:24

LUKE: Yeah, it makes perfect sense. I think we all feel that way at times.

24:28

What are you doing to combat the loneliness? Do you have friends or family to

24:32

talk to? Do you have a boyfriend? You're on the dating scene. What's your social

24:35

life look like?

24:39

RENEE: You're right. I think a lot of us struggle with feeling lonely, even when

24:44

we're surrounded by people. Honestly, my social life is kind of non-existent these days. I

24:48

mean, I've got my coworkers, but it's not the same. You know, and as for

24:52

dating, that's just been a bust. I tried the apps for a while, but it

24:57

just felt so forced and awkward. I don't know. Maybe I'm just too picky or

25:01

something. And my family, well, they're great, but they live back east. It's not like

25:06

I can just pop over for coffee whenever I'm feeling down.

25:10

LUKE: No, I understand. That's tough. And loneliness creeps up. It's good that you're not

25:15

sacrificing your values or settling for whoever's around. But it's all right to be alone.

25:19

It's all right to feel lonely. I prefer it over the company of others most

25:24

of the time. So I do understand. Unless it's being a problem. If you really

25:28

want to make connections with people, then you've got to put in the effort to

25:33

do that. And that's through joining community events or volunteering or finding a hobby that

25:37

is with other people. There's people out there that are looking for friendships and connections.

25:42

And you can find them if you put in the effort.

25:46

RENEE: You're absolutely right. I know I need to make more of an effort to

25:51

put myself out there and find those connections. It's just so easy to get stuck

25:55

in your routine, you know? But you're right. I can't just sit around feeling sorry

26:00

for myself. Maybe I'll look into some local history groups or see if there are

26:04

any yoga studios that do social events. Heck, I could probably even volunteer at some

26:09

of the weddings I plan. Just to be around people. I guess I'm just scared,

26:13

you know? Putting yourself out there is scary. But I know it's the only way

26:18

I'm going to break this cycle of loneliness. Thanks for listening.

26:22

LUKE: Oh, sorry about that, Renee. But you're welcome. I hope everything works out for

26:26

you. Sounds like you know what you need to do. So go do it. And

26:31

for our last call, we're going to take Vince. Vince, you're the last call the

26:35

night. How can we help you today?

26:39

VINCE: Hey, thanks for taking my call, man. I've been going through some real shit

26:43

lately, you know? This custody battle with my ex has been just tearing me apart.

26:47

I mean, I thought we had it all figured out. It's just this back and

26:51

forth nightmare and I can't even focus on anything else. It's like I see those

26:55

headlines about all these other celebrity divorces and I'm just sitting here thinking, yeah, that's

26:59

me too.

27:03

LUKE: Yeah, divorce is never easy. It's a tough thing. I'm sorry that you're going

27:07

through it. What's the problem? Why is this more difficult than what you expected?

27:12

VINCE: Well, I guess I just, I don't know, man. I thought we had it

27:16

all figured out, you know? We were supposed to make this transition as smooth as

27:20

possible for the kids. But now it's just turning into this ugly custody battle. My

27:25

ex is fighting me on everything. The house, the finances, even just the damn visitation

27:29

schedule. I'm a goddamn hunting guide for a living. And suddenly, I'm spending all my

27:34

time in court instead of out in the woods, you know? It's just, it's just

27:38

wearing me down, you know? I feel like I'm losing everything.

27:43

LUKE: You had divorces like that. You're losing quite a bit. You're losing the life

27:47

that you used to have. And it's going to take a little while to go

27:51

through that process and when you get on the other side of it, you're going

27:56

to have to rebuild it all back from, you know, from, not from nothing, but

28:00

from a much more basic stance. And you need to start thinking about what you

28:04

want that new life to look like.

28:08

VINCE: Yeah, exactly. I mean, that's the thing I had this whole life planned out,

28:13

you know? The job I love, the house, the family. And now it's all just

28:17

crumbling around me. I'm trying to stay positive, but it's just so damn hard, man.

28:22

I see these headlines about other people going through the same thing. And it makes

28:26

me feel a little less alone. But at the same time, I'm just like, damn,

28:31

why does it have to be this way? I keep thinking about that new life.

28:35

Like you said, but it's just so overwhelming, you know?

28:39

LUKE: I do know. I've been there myself. It's not fun. It doesn't have to

28:44

be that way, but it often is. And it is what it is. So you're

28:48

going to have to deal with it and come out on the other side. There's

28:52

not much choice that you have in the matter. You know, you're already in court.

28:57

All the proceedings are in motion. You just got to wait it out, do, you

29:01

know, put one foot in front of the other until you get to the end.

29:05

And then move on with your life.

29:10

VINCE: Yeah, man. I hear you. I guess I'm just feeling a little lost right

29:14

now, you know? Like, I'm trying to stay positive and look to the future. But

29:18

it's just so damn hard when I'm stuck in the middle of all this legal

29:22

bullshit. I keep thinking about that new life, but it's like, where the hell do

29:27

I even start? You know? I'm a hunting guy. That's all I've ever really known.

29:31

And now I'm stuck in this courtroom battle instead of being out in the woods

29:35

where I feel at home. I just, I don't know. I guess I'm just looking

29:40

for a little direction, you know?

29:44

LUKE: Well, that's the direction I can give you is to keep going to court,

29:49

fight your hardest for, you know, so you don't get screwed. Or at least so

29:53

you get screwed as little as possible. And then, and then move on. So right

29:58

now it's going to suck. That's part of the deal. And you just have to

30:02

get through it. Other people have done it. You're not the first person to get

30:07

divorced. So it's definitely a process that does work. You will get through it. And

30:11

one day, not too far from now, you'll be on the other end of it.

30:16

And you need to be ready to pick up and carry on.

30:20

VINCE: You're right, man. I guess I just got to keep my head down and

30:25

power through this bullshit, huh? It's not going to be easy, but I can't just

30:30

roll over either. I got a fight for what's mine and for what's best for

30:34

the kids, you know? It's just so damn draining dealing with all this legal crap

30:39

instead of being out in the woods where I belong. But you're right. I'm not

30:43

the first person to go through this. And I won't be the last. I just

30:48

got to take it one day at a time. Keep focused on the end game

30:53

and get ready to build that new life. Whatever that ends up looking like.

30:57

LUKE: All right there, Vince. Good luck to you. I hope everything works out. I

31:01

know it will. It always does. And you'll be back in the woods before you

31:05

know it. That's our show for tonight, folks. Thanks for tuning in. And I check

31:09

back with us tomorrow. Remember the number of you'd like to call in is 208-439-LUK-208-439-5853.

31:13

Good night.